My friends, ever since Chairman OBAMA "won" (I still haven't met a single person who voted for him) the election in 09 HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED has used his failed presidency to turn the fire hose on us, the White Christian majority. On his first day in office BARRYO opened up the ACORN run FEMA concentration camps. Then he sent his jackbooted SS "cenus takers" to figure out where all the Ch Continue Reading »

Violence marred yet another day of protest in the North Pole capital city of Santa's village. Protestors made up mainly of the ethnic minority elf populations converged on Gumdrop Plaza demanding an end income inequality, an end to austerity and representation and accountability in the country's lower house. Despite mounting pressure from the international community, within an hour the elvish p Continue Reading »

The Oxford English Dictionary confirmed today that former Vice Presidential candidate's Sarah Palin name will be added to the English lexicon as a synonym for the now politically incorrect terms retard and retarded. The OED was quick to point out that Palin will only be used to identify those who lack mental handicaps but behave foolishly. This is not the first time the dictionary has added

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Congressman John Boehner revealed his thoughts on the US unprecedented economic crisis in an interview with Matt Taibbi of Rolling Stone. Taibbi was granted access to Boehner while preparing to cover the 2 year anniversarry of the angry town halls. Boehner stuck to Republican party talking points until Taibbi during a coffee break asked Boehner about today's young people. Boehner, a

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NYPD Police Commissioner Ray Kelly clarified the department's position as solidly supporting NYC's produst instituion Wall St. Saying at a luncheon on Park Ave with Vice Presidents from Wall St brokerages Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley/Smith Barney "Wall St is New York. Nothing in New York would be possible without Wall St and I'm here to tell you- the NYPD has your back. New York is the p Continue Reading »

Mark Zuckerberg confirmed to CNN that Facebook will be shutting down for one day on April 15 to protest the IRS' requirement that Facebook pay taxes. "Facebook is the future- Facebook is the omega and the epsilon" an unusually animated Zuckerberg said on CNN's American Morning news style show Continue Reading »

America's greatest threat, Kenyan born Muslim President Baraq Obama further eroded American exceptionalism today by announcing that America would negotiate with terrorists. Over the course of an "intense" taxpayer funded 30 minute long distance call Obama negotiated with Al Qaeda leaders in Afghanistan, Iran, North Korea, and France. What did Chairman Obama give Al Qaeda? No one is allowe

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With Bin Ladens' death slowly fading into history many Senior White House Officials have privately indicated that President Obama will soon announce an end the War on Terror. The policy implications of an end to the multi trillion dollar, ten year war would be significant and, one Senior White House Official proudly stated, would eliminate projected budget deficit in 5 years.

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